Losing someone to suicide is an intensely isolating and painful experience.  One that is often compounded by the pervasive stigma and misconceptions that surround it. This stigma often goes unrecognized and misunderstood.

The immediate aftermath of a suicide loss unleashes a tidal wave of emotions: shock, disbelief, sorrow, anger, guilt, and an overwhelming barrage of “what if” questions. While these feelings are universal to grief, those mourning a loss due to self-harm face an added layer of distress. Our grief-avoidant culture, uncomfortable with suicide, often responds with silence, judgment, or well-intentioned but often hurtful platitudes. 

One of the most damaging aspects for survivors is the stigma itself. Suicide is frequently spoken of in whispers, seen as a shameful secret, or mistakenly perceived as a moral failing – not only of the deceased but also of their entire family. This leads to a profound sense of isolation. Friends and family, unsure how to react, may distance themselves, and the natural outpouring of support seen in other forms of bereavement can be conspicuously absent, leaving survivors feeling abandoned and alone in their immense pain.

This intense isolation is further exacerbated by harmful myths surrounding suicide. The myth that suicide is a selfish act inflicts immense guilt on those left behind. The belief that talking about suicide encourages it leads to a dangerous silence, preventing open discussion and vital support. Furthermore, the myth that those who die by suicide are weak or lack faith can be deeply hurtful to both the deceased’s memory and the grieving family.

These myths and stigmas often force survivors to suffer in silence, internalizing their pain and concealing their true emotions. This isolation can intensify their trauma, making societal reactions as distressing as the loss itself and leaving them to navigate a complicated emotional landscape without adequate support.

We must cultivate a society where suicide is understood as a complex public health issue. One linked to mental illness, overwhelming circumstances, or a profound sense of hopelessness –  rather than being met with judgment, blame, and condemnation. It is crucial that we challenge these damaging narratives. We need to create more spaces where those grieving a suicide loss can speak openly, find compassion, and receive the support they need without fear of judgment.

Grief, in its essence, is universal. Individuals who have lost a loved one to suicide are entitled to the same empathy, understanding, and support as anyone else experiencing bereavement. They need compassion, not judgement. By actively working to dismantle the stigma and debunk the myths surrounding suicide, we can begin to mend deep wounds and provide comfort to those who have already suffered immeasurable pain.